The most awful punishment

“’Twas the most awful punishment anyone could give a child,” says Watson. “Imagine, havin’ to lick your own father! I tell you, Josh, it near broke my heart. Say, didn’t it keep us good, though!”
      It wouldn’t have kept this infant good; I’d have laced the old bugger till his arse fell off. But then, I never had any proper filial regard, and if you’d ever met my guv’nor you’d understand why.


Flashman and the Angel of the Lord, pp.246-47, Harper Collins, 1995.


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Squinted wisely

…he fixed his thumbs in his belt and squinted wisely at me, like an owl in labour…

Flashman's Lady, p.18, Pan edition, 1979.

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Delight in cruelty

Oh, the holy satisfaction of the godly – when it comes to delight in cruelty I’m just a child compared to them.

Flash For Freedom!, p.120, Pan edition, 8th printing, 1980.

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William Wilberforce and pious humbug

Why my pious acquaintances won’t believe this [African involvement in ths slave trade], I can’t fathom. They enslaved their own kind, in mills and factories and mines, and made ‘em live in kennels that an Alabama planter wouldn’t have dreamed of putting a black into. Aye, and our dear old dead Sir William Wilberforce cheered ‘em on, too – weeping his pious old eyes out over niggers* he had never seen, and damning the soul of anyone who suggested it was a bit hard to make white infants pull coal sledges for 12 hours a day. Of course he knew where his living came from. My point is; if he and his kind did it to their people, why should they suppose the black rulers were any different where their kinsfolk were concerned? They make me sick with their pious humbug.

Flash For Freedom!, pp.63-64, Pan edition, 8th printing, 1980.

*Flashman's use of racial epitahs is a continuing problem for more enlightened, contemporary readers. The inclusion of these passages should not be taken as tacit support of his misanthropic, 19th century view of race relations.

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